Virginity and Diversity of feeling. Vol.8, No.10

Talk on Virginity and feeling.
Moderator Collins Dnony
Today we will discussing an interesting topic and Its such that has really thrown so many people into confusion and state of which is right and which is not right.
Today is diversity of Feelings and virginity.

It’s going to be an open floor contribution as I take it one after the other.
I remain my humble self Collins
Questions
What is feeling and what’s diversity in feelings?
Do you think feeling is an emotional state or reaction?
What do you understand by Virginity
Do you think virginity is more of a mental picture and mindset than physical attributes??
Does virginity has a state or a being of what is expected
If you say virginity isn’t a mindset thing, what will you say about a virgin girl who engages in Masturbation??
Does being a virgin meant only for the female gender alone is or is it also for both génder and why do one think.
Does a feeling have a connection with virginity?
Does losing or breaking one’s Virginity change them or change who they are?
Why do people make a deal about a lady’s virginity more than that of men
Why would a man blast his wife for not being a virgin yet he is not one
Does virginity measure the true worth of a lady
: Do you think people’s feelings are responsible for the lost of their virginity or reasons they engage in such acts
How do one maintain a feeling of Less erotic and sexuality
Do our feelings determine our actions??
Finally how can one deal with diversity in thoughts and feelings

ANSWERS , REACTIONS AND COMMENTS
Feelings:
I I think it means having a special likeness for a person or group of persons.
And giving preferential treatment to them.
Ii Feeling is an emotional state or reaction to something while diversity in feeling is the variety of emotions, or the divergences to reaction

  1. It’s emotional, Its both emotional, physical, spiritual and chemical reaction
    3/4. virginity
    It is the act of being a virgin, simply put in its natural form
    There is no one definition of virginity. For some, being a virgin means you haven’t had any kind of penetrative sex — whether that’s vaginal, anal, or even oral. Others may define virginity as never engaging in vaginal penetration with a penis, despite having had other types of sex, including oral stimulation and anal penetration.
    Virginity is not a mental picture or mindset.
  2. The state not having any form of sexual intercourse and it is also when Chastity comes in
  3. Yeah, he is no longer a virgin because he has distorted the natural form of his sexual organs
    By using any instrument to stimulate him or herself in order to ejaculate or to reach the mountain, he is has distorted that natural form
    Reactions
    She said the natural form is distorted. I haven’t seen or heard of distortion of the male genitalia as a result of sex with instrument that’s why I’m doubting.
    Yeah, when a lady masturbates, there are 99.9 percent chances of breaking your hymen, which is distortion.
    Your hymen — like your finger or your ear — is just a body part. It doesn’t determine whether or not you’re a virgin any more than your toes do. Plus, not everyone is born with a hymen, and if they are, it may be a very small piece of tissue. You — and you alone — decide the status of your virginity.
    Hymen is not a true test of virginity
    It could break yet…one is still a virgin
    True talk, it can break through strenuous activities
    This is applicable in 1.3percent of the female population, so it isn’t generally acceptable
    Another example is A lady who engages in strenuous exercises …even riding bicycles could break the hymen
  4. Virginity is for everyone both male and female
    8./9 Virginity and feelings
    Sexual feelings
    Yea…..sexual virginity is clearly defined in the words of our Lady to the Archangel; “How can it be, Since I KNOW NOT a man.” Luke 1:26-end.
    I agree with this because I really can’t place it, is it on respect of sex/ masturbation or generally medical wise, anatomically etc
    Its on the basis of sex
    To be sexually a virgin in general sense…should be not having sexual intercourse with the opposite.
    sex means different things to different people, so virginity can mean different things, too.
    A lot of people think that having penis-in-vagina sex for the first time is how you lose your virginity. But this leaves lots of people and other types of sex out of the picture.
    Some people haven’t had penis-in-vagina sex, but they’ve had other kinds of sex (like oral sex or anal sex) — and they may or may not see themselves as virgins. And there are lesbian, gay, bisexual or pansexual people who may never have penis-in-vagina sex at all. But they probably don’t see themselves as lifelong virgins just because they haven’t had penis-in-vagina sex.
    Many people believe rape and sexual assault aren’t sex — it’s only sex if both partners have consent. So if someone was forced or pressured the first time they had vaginal sex, oral sex, or anal sex, they may not see that as “losing their virginity.
    Virginity and feelings don’t really have a connection Because virginity is a state of being While feelings are emotions and reactions
    I don’t think so… Because the reason why many non virgins seldom stay without sex for a period of time is due to the ecstasy of its feelings unlike the virgin’s who never responded to the feelings.
    Virginity influences the emotions
    The first sign of one losing his or her virginity or ever planning to starts with feelings .Exactly though. But some are unplanned
    the state of never having had sexual intercourse: the state of being a virgin This is virginity, so the feeling one might have might be pitiably OK especially when she wants to return to the state she was probably she was raped or had done things she regretted, but that doesn’t change the definition, the doesn’t change the meaning of the word, Virginity
    Are you trying to say that the fear of loosing virginity can make one abstain from sex🤔
    You are no longer talking about virginity oo… you are now talking about sexual integrity… Virginity is a physical something so what’s the connection with feeling
    They all connote
    Somehow for those who values their virginity?
    It doesn’t also change the fact that some lose their virginity because they adhered to their passion.
    Yes it does…one can abstain from sex because of the value attached to virginity which may be from the moral or religious value
    But this doesn’t prove the fact that virginity has to do with feeling.
    Agreed It doesn’t
    When one feels She isn’t and won’t be valued as a maiden if disvirgined….do you think she will consent to sex? Exactly. This is not feeling, it is called moral
    Thanks for the answers
    And when one feels sexually urged and doesn’t control the FEELINGS… Sex happens ….virginity lost
    Moral is when you stand your ground and know that its not good. Feeling is when you are indifferent just that you don’t want to be tagged non virgin among your Christian brethren.

In a way to tackle this problem Christ spoke about fornication: It’s not only in having contact but “in looking lustily-you have fornicated “
Pictures we developed in our mind even without masturbating can cus these releases to occur…
Remember we are talking about sexual feelings.
Exactly dear….but it’s true. It’s not moral in that respect but feelings

Concept of Virginity….. overview @ Collins
There is no one definition of virginity. For some, being a virgin means you haven’t had any kind of penetrative sex — whether that’s vaginal, anal, or even oral. Others may define virginity as never engaging in vaginal penetration with a penis, despite having had other types of sex, including oral stimulation and anal penetration.
Many people believe the only way to “lose” your virginity is through vaginal penetration with a penis, but that’s not the case.
Some people may no longer call themselves a virgin after engaging in anal penetration or penetration with a finger or sex toy. Others may reconsider their virginity status after receiving or giving oral stimulation. When it comes to virginity and sex, there’s so much more than just P in V.
Oh, the hymen — the stuff of legend. You’ve probably heard the myth that if you have a hymen, it will break during vaginal penetration. But that’s all that is: a myth.
The average hymen isn’t a piece of flat tissue that covers the vaginal opening, like the myth claims. Instead, it’s usually a loose — and not at all intact — piece of tissue that hangs around the vagina.
Depending on its size, a hymen can be torn during penetrative sex, exercise, or some other physical activity. But it won’t “pop,” because it simply can’t.Your hymen has nothing to do with the status of your virginity

Your hymen — like your finger or your ear — is just a body part. It doesn’t determine whether or not you’re a virgin any more than your toes do. Plus, not everyone is born with a hymen, and if they are, it may be a very small piece of tissue. You — and you alone — decide the status of your virginity.
Reactions
It can …depending on the value attached to it.
Depending on the person & the situation that resulted to the lost of virginity, it can greatly affect the person or not, & if it does, it can possibly change the person
This is a nice analysis but u didn’t hit the nail at the head. In the religious perspective what is VIRGINITY. CLEAR THIS CONFUSION TO US PLEAESE
One thing we miss as Christians is that who we are has already been established by God and nothing can change that
Do they lose their virginity?
It can change one if such a person is condemned for the act, and insulted or mocked for loosing her virginity.
I say yes because I know a person, a distant friend per say that lost of virginity due to rape changed her this was due to how she presently now view sex to be.
It may or may not change them depending on the individual involved and in the situation in which the virginity was broken. If it was broken out of consent, this can cause emotional and psychological trauma which indirectly influences the person’s behaviour
But someone else can become a Christian after being raped due to circumstances surrounding him or her. The life son or isn’t it so?
so if the virginity is lost in a sincere & acceptable / happy way….it most probably gives the person a fulfilled sense of sexual life…. Still could affect the life positive or still the person remains just the way they were
Why do people make a deal about a lady’s virginity more than that of men
Why would a man blast his wife for not being a virgin yet he is not one
Does virginity measure the true worth of a lady
ANSWERS
Honestly brother I don’t know but I’m not against it because it shows that a lady’s body is more important.
I think environment has a lot to do here. If your environment does not see this as a crime as in most modern families -then things remain normal.
But talking from Christian perspective and the environment of a Christian (body of Christ ) -it must affect you(because sin brings no happiness ). There’s punishment for sin and penance if u need it off your head. Therefore you will ever feel sorry for what you’ve done which is a great change on you😃
No it doesn’t measure a lady’s worth because not all chaste persons are virgins and virgins are chaste.
Chastity is the goal.
Well this is a social mental configuration. Meanwhile u know that there is no parameter measure of virginity among men, so delving into that is a vain mission. Hence the society makes due of what is real until that of men is disclosed.
If it’s with a partner Eg in marriage, it has a special touch in that marriage (I don’t know how to explain further) thereby giving the couple more reasons to be happier & improves trust.

In other cases, gives you a sense of respect, honour & regard thereby making you feel good, like a responsible human & not tempering with your sense of self & guilt per say

Sex/ virginity isn’t just about religion or personality, it adds special sensitive touches
Personally to me , I say No!
I think a lady’s worth is what she sets it to be therefore its dependent on the mindset
Is a chaste pregnant woman a virgin?
Most times it is out of guilt, A man who has lost count of the number of women he has slept with would not want to marry such women, Blame it on pride?
I don’t know,
But to me a woman with such lifestyle might end up only praying to get married and she might even find a good man.
This life is very funny; we should thrive to do what is right.
Well virginity alone does not measure the true worth of a woman but there is no one straight moral value that measures the true worth of a woman
There could be many reasons for this. One of which maybe before marriage the man wanted to know her carnally but the woman said she was still a virgin only to come after marriage and be disappointed. This most likely leads to lack of trust in partners.
And I don’t think such situations happens to those who are sincere about themselves
It’s the society especially our African culture….. A lady has limited or no permission to engage in sex, it’s obvious from the fact that Polygamy is acceptable & polyandry is unheard of couple with the fact that biologically a woman is said to have hymen- a proof of virginity🥱
Do you think people’s feelings are responsible for the lost of their virginity or reasons they engage in such acts
Another question, how do one maintain a feeling of Less erotic and sexuality
Another question Does our feelings determine our actions??
Finally how can one deal with diversity in thoughts and feelings
Answers and reactions
Some don’t even want to be virgins, they feel its a thing of the past. While some were misguided, raped, had accident and the likes
To this question I will say that. A lot of things we expose put senses to contribute a lot
It does only if you don’t fight against it. That’s where Christianity comes into utmost help
Guide your five senses jealously because it controls every part of you
Just feel them with God’s words
Guide ones senses and being occupied positively
like massages in a phone, one can ignore it or never open it by deleting it from his or her mind. Though it’s not so easy
Guide your five senses jealously because it controls every part of you
Just feel them with God’s words
We tend to practically act & think wat we have seen / heard from friends, societies & movies especially…… Organise your senses & try to abstain from what will later corrupt your thoughts & action.
Our bodies aren’t nollywood experiments
How can you deal with various thoughts coming up on your head
I think one could involve self in a discussion: where he or she can spill out the thought within. This would be effective in a well guided or scrutinize platform or group.
But also remember, you shouldn’t boast of work doesn’t mean you shouldn’t work.
Paul also said flee from immortality, your wor k here is to flee & it start by your thoughts & actions
Get busy with other things it could be as simple as washing plate or strolling out or even gusting wit reasonable friends. I mean reasonable I use the word remove your mind
Positivity and negativity are relative words. What is positive to you might be negative to me. So please can you shed more light?
Pray again bad thought and keep yourself busy
Pray fervently & trust the Lord, most important In fact the first step
At some point, sharing these thought help
On the other pondering on them could be just the means to finding a solutions
Mind the friends you hang around with.
Mind the groups you join on social media.
Mind the type of chat you engage yourself with.
Mind who you share your knowledge with

Conclusion on Virginity @ collins

Your Virginity is Not a Trophy drawing examples from church teaching with bible references
She lived a life of promiscuity, going from one dysfunctional relationship to the next. She’d earned a reputation for herself. Everyone knew what she was about — she was easy enough and guys knew they wouldn’t need to impress her with nice dates, pursue a committed relationship with her, or courageously protect her purity — she had compromised that a long time ago. And when Jesus encountered her, He said to her “I won’t condemn you. Go, and sin no more” (John 8:11).
As Christian women, there’s a temptation to believe a very skewed idea, actually a flat out lie, about our identity, our goodness, and our sexuality. That lie goes something like this: as long as you remain a virgin before marriage, you are good. If you don’t though, if you fall in some way or another, you are damaged irreparably.
This lie, like all lies, distorts a truth — the truth that our sexuality is good, has a purpose, and needs to be integrated into who we are; therefore, we shouldn’t abuse or seek to harm our sexuality through sin. When we jump to the conclusion that the moment we fall into sexual sin, we become damaged and are no longer good, that very good truth becomes distorted — it becomes a lie. That lie reduces us, our identity, and our worth to our sexual purity. We are so much more. Our identity, our worth, and our dignity rests in something so much greater than our sexuality.
Jesus shows us this when He encounters the woman caught in adultery in the Gospel of John: He sees her, a whole person made in His own image, and loves her. He sees her sin, but He doesn’t define her by it, He sees her past but looks beyond it — He sees her, loves her… and calls her to a better life than what she’s settled for in her relationships of artificial love.
Our goodness rests in our identity as daughters of God. We are good because we are desired by God. We are good because we are loved by God. And He loves us, not because of anything we will ever do, but because we have been created by Him and He desires us. This is why our mistakes don’t irreparably damage us, but rather give us an occasion to seek Jesus and let Him love us.
Whether you’re living a life of chastity or have fallen into sexual sin, you deserve so much more than the narrative that this lie perpetuates.
Virginity connotes with the mind and soul always aspire to pure in soul and in mind, the church bestows Perpetual virginity of ladies who willingly decides not to engage in sexual intercourse be you a physical virgin or not.
Finally, virginity first starts with the mindset and your thoughts, and your Emotions and Emotional thoughts.
All these must also be pure for you to be called a full and through virgin.

Conclusions on Feelings
The nature of feelings define your attitude’
We have so many wishes for ourselves, but we never keep “Good Wishes” for others, because we do not think its worth keeping.
We have so many wishes for ourselves, but we never keep “Good Wishes” for others, because we do not think its worth keeping. The biggest reason behind this is lack of knowledge. One does not knows that “Good Wishes” might work wonders for us as well as for others.
Good wishes are like vitamin injection that energises instantly, generating vibrations of pure feelings into the atmosphere, creating instant happiness.
One must have the feeling of benevolence for everyone. Through the power of benevolent feelings, elevated thoughts, positive attitude and pure vibrations, one can serve the whole world from any place. One must always keep this in mind that our feelings are created from thoughts and the nature of such feelings determines our attitude.
Hence when we extend pure love to everyone with selfless motivation, it is considered kindness. Likewise to send good feelings and pure wishes to those who are in deep sorrow is mercy and compassion, To bless and uplift someone even as they defame one is forgiveness. To remain tolerant under a situation and take responsibility as well as give cooperation even when not appreciated humility and self-respect.
With all these virtues and positivity, we empower ourselves and at the same time empower others. So why not all of us open a savings account in good wishes bank and start depositing Good Wishes daily to make our future happy, peaceful and prosperous.
Feelings are thoughts and actions we give out or react to here are basic guidelines for feelings.
It’s normal to think or feel about sex — often or only once in a while. As we go through puberty, hormones affect our bodies and emotions in new ways. This makes us curious about sex, and more likely to have sexual thoughts and feelings.
As you go through these changes, you may start to find some people attractive. Sexual attraction includes thoughts, feelings, and body sensations. It’s normal to think about someone, want to be around them, or even feel awkward around them. These new thoughts and feelings can be confusing at first. But they are a normal part of maturing and growing up.
Most people think about sex long before they are ready to have sex. Deciding when you are ready is a big personal decision. Take your time. Before you act on thoughts about sex, be sure you are ready to have sex that is safe, healthy, and caring.

Another Aspect of Feelings
No one ever died from their feelings, but millions have died from abusing substances in the name of avoiding their feelings.” —Unknown
Avoiding pain is a natural response. Pain is nature’s way of telling us we’re not physically safe. Emotional pain alerts us that something is not going well in our lives, and in order to feel better, we must do something different. Whether you’re feeling anxious, depressed, or just plain, blah, the first step toward getting better is feeling your feelings.
It’s common and healthy to question your feelings:
Why do I feel like this?
What exactly do I feel?
I don’t feel anything—what’s wrong here?
Where does my body store feelings?
The purpose of this article is 1) to help increase your awareness of feelings and 2) to offer tools and strategies for identifying and expressing feelings more readily.

7 facts about feelings:

  1. Feelings, unlike thoughts, involve a physical reaction which often “takes over” the body. Anxious feelings cause increases in heart rate, breathing, perspiration, and even shaking or trembling. It’s common to vividly remember the physical sensations of a panic attack, but recall very little of the thoughts and fears that precipitated it.
    Solution: Get out of your head and tune into your body. Although you can’t see your brain’s limbic system or your autonomic nervous system (where feelings are stored), you can close your eyes and focus on regular, conscious breath until you feel more centered, calm, and relaxed.
  2. Feelings do not just appear “out of the blue.” Feelings are a direct result of your thoughts and perceptions. As out of control, intense, and scary the emotion, it’s important to remember that you created it. Further complicating anxious feelings is the unconscious.

Solution: Keep a journal of your most prevalent thoughts throughout the week. Identifying thoughts and the corresponding feelings helps you recognize unhealthy patterns. Some thoughts may be so automatic that you don’t realize how prevalent they are until you see them on paper. Pay close attention to thoughts that don’t correspond to reality. “I just know I’m going to have a panic attack during the presentation” is probably not realistic if you have a good track record regarding public speaking.

  1. Feelings are categorized as simple or complex. Think of basic or simple emotions like anger, sadness, grief, fear, love, or excitement. Basic feelings tend to be short-lived, reactive, and are more tied to the physical changes in the body. More complex feelings include disappointment, weariness, impatience, and ambivalence. Complex feelings are a combination of more than one simple emotion, usually last longer, and are more involved in thought and rumination.

Solution: Distinguish basic from complex emotions to sort out what’s going on, and reinforce that feelings do not always come in pure form, but rather in mixtures. For example, hiking in the woods and confronting a bear is a basic emotion (fear) with an identifiable trigger (the bear). This is a pure feeling. Free-floating or generalized anxiety (without an obvious object or trigger) is a complex emotion. Think of the mixture of anger, guilt, and love that you feel when arguing with your partner, child, or close friend.

  1. Feelings give you energy. When you are clear, you are more apt to share your life. We’re all wired to connect with others, and these connections serve as a buffer against a constricted and isolated existence. If you withhold or suppress feelings, you go through life experiencing a certain numbness or emptiness.

Solution: When stuck or listless, ask yourself three important questions:

How do I feel?
What do I want?
What actions do I need to take?

  1. Feelings can be contagious. You’re likely to feel sad, weepy, and depressed when in the company of someone who’s crying. Conversely, if you surround yourself with happy, enthusiastic company, their positive vibes rub off on you.
    Solution: The more “in touch” with your inner

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.