SELF FORGIVENESS

TOPIC: SELF FORGIVENESS

MODERATOR: COLLINS EZEA

DATE: 23RD JULY,2021

Moderator: Before we start, what do you think is self forgiveness??

Audience: Self forgiveness is to release your self of guilt of being wrong.

Self forgiveness is the ability to let go of your past guilts or mistakes and seek for something good that will ultimately make you feel happy and easily forget those bad old days.

Moderator: Having established what Self-forgiveness is, why is self-forgiveness important?

Why do people need self forgiveness?

Self forgiveness is the ability to let go of your past guilts or mistakes and seek for something good that will ultimately make you feel happy and easily forget those bad old days.

Guilty, what’s self guilty and why would people develop such ?

Does this have any mental effect on the individual

What’s even causes individuals to develop self guilty?

Self forgiveness is the greatest forgiveness one can ever think of in life.

Once someone does not forgive him/herself, it causes psychological or emotional disorder in a person and you hardly see the person smile or become happy again in life. We need self forgiveness to avoid transfer of aggression to innocent people.

Also self forgiveness helps us to be in Union with God because most times we may commit something and feel that not even God can forgive us but that’s because we never forgive ourselves, if we forgive ourselves, we see God as a loving, merciful and forgiving Father just as in the case of the famous prodigal son, who realized and forgave himself and we see how he was treated like more than a prince.

Moderator: Does aggression has something to do with self forgiveness?

For me yes,

Because when someone is acting aggressively, he is only acting based on emotion because reasoning had gone on lockdown.

Then self unforgiveness emerges when someone is acting based on feeling or emotion only, because it doesn’t afford one an opportunity to think and reflect very well except by God’s grace and the help of a clinical Psychologist.

So what are those things that can lead to self guilt?

Self-forgiveness is not easy because it involves recognizing uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. Some view the act as a reminder of not being a perfect person. Others see it as a way to love yourself while accepting your imperfections. People want to move on but find it hard to do so without doing what is necessary to make peace from within. Forgiving yourself requires understanding, empathy, and thoughtfulness. People may not realize they have the ability to forgive themselves because it is something you must practice while recognizing it as a choice.

How you do this may impact multiple areas in your life.

Choosing to forgive yourself doesn’t mean you are weak. It does not mean you are off the hook for what happened. It does not mean you tolerate behaviors that occurred. Forgiveness, whether of someone else or yourself, means you accept actions and behaviors that occurred while willing to move forward. You are eager to move on, knowing you can’t change what happened. Forgiving yourself means letting go of the feelings and emotions associated with what went wrong. You let go of any resentment or anger. It may be easier to do this when forgiving others, but many find it hard to do this fWhat Happens When You Forgive Yourself

Several things happen when you take steps to forgive yourself. You accept responsibility for what happened. You express remorse, guilt, or other similar emotions that point out what you did was wrong or unacceptable. You make amends with yourself while restoring self-trust. It helps to focus your thoughts on taking better actions in the future.

When you’re responsible, you show compassion for yourself while putting things behind you. The first step to forgiving yourself is recognizing what happened and taking responsibility. You shouldn’t make excuses or justify why you did it. You face the facts and leave it by accepting your actions. Accepting your actions limits the amount of guilt and regret.

It is normal to feel guilty when you’ve done something wrong. It helps to look at your guilt as a starting point to change your behavior. Feeling guilt is considered healthy because you can view yourself as a good person that made a mistake. You may see yourself as a bad person when feeling shameful. Shame brings unwanted feelings that could lead to depression or addiction. When you acknowledge mistakes, it doesn’t take away from your values.

Taking steps to forgive yourself includes taking appropriate actions to make amends. Usually, when you forgive someone, they do something to make it up to you. You’ll need to consider what action is necessary to help yourself feel like you earned forgiveness. Learning how to forgive is part of understanding what to do to make things right again. If you need to apologize, do so meaningfully. You may think doing this benefits the other person more, but it is just as beneficial for you too. Later on, you won’t regret not taking the opportunity or wondering if you should have done more.

Forgiving yourself lets you move forward with a renewed focus on your thoughts and actions. You’re less likely to hate yourself later or dwell on the situation, which could hurt your self-esteem. At this point, you’re ready to learn how to grow and be open to understanding why you expressed such actions. Consider what you’ve learned and how it can help later. Understand why you behaved that way, can you prevent it in the future, and why you expressed it. Practicing these actions put you in a better position to forgive yourself in the future.

Why It Matters To Your Mental Health

Understanding the act of forgiving yourself is significant to personal growth and self-improvement. One of the most crucial benefits of self-forgiveness is improving your self-image. As you learn and practice how to forgive yourself, it reduces the risk of anxiety and depressive symptoms. You learn self-compassion, and you naturally boost your self-esteem. People are more likely to maintain positive productivity and reach goals.

If you don’t exercise ways to forgive yourself, your mental health suffers in more ways than one. People may not realize how their mental health suffers. If you don’t learn or practice aspects of forgiveness, you beat yourself up often and will struggle to move on from mistakes. It may not be as easy as you think to forgive others if you are not willing to forgive yourself meaningfully.

Your mental health is essential in different areas of your life. It plays a vital role in decision-making and problem-solving. When you feel good about yourself, you’ll make better choices with long-term effects. Forgiveness is a choice that says you want what is best for yourself. It is a reminder that you have to make tough choices and work through consequences to see results.

In conclusion,

Forgiving yourself isn’t easy because it is hard to accept the fact you made a mistake. Dwelling on it may lead to self-hatred, which is what you should avoid. It may not be easy to forgive yourself if you’re not able to take back what happened or make things right. It is hard to come to terms with something that doesn’t line up with your values or beliefs.  Sometimes deep feelings of regret and guilt result in doing something that’s not part of your character.

People rather ruminate the problem instead because they don’t want to admit to their actions. Forgiveness requires a person to change when acknowledging what they did, and some are not ready to do so. Assuming you need to change your ways is a start, but you need to engage in appropriate action to move on effectively.

Practicing how to forgive yourself encourages your mind and body to calm itself when facing unwanted emotions. When you don’t forgive yourself, it is easy to fall into a mental trap of shame, anger, and despair. Instead of beating yourself up about the situation, you can be proactive. Forgiving yourself reinforces this aspect while keeping anxiety and depression at bay. However, practicing also helps you learn valuable lessons essential to self-improvement. Here are tips to help you practice:

Spend time understanding what forgiveness means. Sometimes people are quick to overlook the concept of forgiveness because they assume it means what happened was okay. It doesn’t not. Think about when a friend hurt you unintentionally, and they apologize while asking for your forgiveness. You may have felt worried or hurt for a minute, but when they acknowledged what they did, you felt better. It was easy for you to move on and not let it bother you. The concept is similar when forgiving yourself, accept you need to be honest about your feelings. Be okay with not being perfect and that you will make mistakes. You can’t grow if you’re not willing to move forward meaningfully. Hold yourself accountable by being responsible. It makes it easier to release unwanted feelings, so they don’t get to you.

Acknowledge your feelings and what you did. You can’t learn from what happened unless you are honest about it. Put aside any judgment and focus on the situation for what it is. What emotions are you feeling? You gain an in-depth understanding of the situation. Your feelings don’t define how you respond to the situation. Taking the time to acknowledge details helps you see things clearly while minimizing remorse and fault. You’ll also want to admit the lesson learned and how to improve moving forward.

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